I honestly didn’t think I would go into writer/director/producer Tom Six’s The Human Centipede 3 (Final Sequence) questioning whether or not part two was the worst entry in the series. Yet here we are.
Just as The Human Centipede 2 exits in a world where part one is just a movie that obsesses the central character, part three pulls the same trick, existing in a world where parts one and two are movies that obsesses a character here. Six recasts part one’s Dieter Laser and part two’s Laurence R. Harvey as Bill Boss and Dwight Butler respectively. Set in a highly dysfunctional and failing prison, Boss is the utterly repellent violent, sexist, racist, rapist everything-ist warden, while Butler is his accountant who suggests turning the prisoners into a centipede as a way of cutting costs and delivering the ultimate criminal deterrent.
The film has absolutely no idea what it’s doing. Clearly it wants to be a comedy, a satire specifically, but it doesn’t realise you’ve got to home in on something to lampoon it. Perhaps it’s supposed to be a satire of America’s prison industrial complex? If so, this prison and the people who run it are such extreme characters, and such lengths are made acknowledge that this is not your normal prison, it’s impossible to make any comparison to the real thing.
Mostly the film is Boss shouting at Butler in a single room. There are very little moments of horror at all. For a film whose maker has bragged about a 500 person long human centipede, showing us a few static shots of the finished thing doesn’t get anywhere near cutting it. It is one of the most boring films I’ve ever seen in my life.
The Human Centipede 3 is horrible, but not in the way it wants to be.